ten day challenge: eight fears, seven wants

Aug 30, 2011

What a whirlwind of a week! I'm into the second week of my new job and really enjoying it. However, it's been an adjustment trying to fit in work, workouts, and things to do at home. I've given myself a break on writing for the past few days- just haven't found the energy. However, I've missed writing and am ready to get back to it! I find that it actually is relaxing if I make time for it.

Back to the "me" challenge- I've decided to do two days at a time. I don't want this thing to drag on forever!
If you're linking up, so glad you've decided to! I've enjoyed reading your posts and learning a bit about you.

Eight Fears.

one. I'm so scared of heights. I can't even walk near the railing on the 2nd floor of the mall without feeling shaky and unbalanced.

two. I'm scared I won't be a good mom. I see my imperfections and I'm afraid my children will get all my bad qualities.

three. As silly as this sounds, I'm afraid that I'll let myself go and eventually be overweight once I have children. I truly feel depressed at times when I feel that I don't look my best - which is dumb because my value is not to be determined by my physical appearance - but I just can't seem to overcome that. I'm working on it.

four. I'm afraid of something terrible happening to my husband or family members. Sometimes I play those things out in my head and actually tear up at the thought. It's unhealthy, I know, but I truly am scared of a life-changing tragedy happening. We're being honest here, right?

five. I'm scared of being in a bad place financially. Money stresses me out and as the one who takes care of the financial things in our house, balancing the checkbook, making sure bills get paid, etc, I tend to freak out when I feel that we aren't secure enough or don't have enough in savings. Even the thought of debt stresses me out. We don't have bad spending habits at all and have a financial plan in order to be debt free within two years - I need to get a grip!

six. I'm afraid that M will stop loving me. I see so many bad marriages around me and I'm afraid that if I'm not daily vigilent, our marriage will turn out like theirs- all because of selfishness.

seven. I'm afraid that I'll get to the end of my life and wish I hadn't rushed through it. I'm afraid I'll not fulfill the purpose God has for me and have just sailed through life doing meaningless tasks and worrying about petty, earthly things.

 eight. On a lighter note, I'm scared of needles and blood. I get weak in the knees just thinking or hearing about blood or needles. And don't even say the word "wrist" and "needles" in the same sentence. I might just pass out!

Seven Wants.

one. I want to be a good wife and mom. I want to be the woman my husband feels like he can confide in, find strength and encouragement in, and love with all his heart and the kind of woman my children will want to be. I want to be kind and show grace to my husband and children because God showed me that same grace.

two. I want to be more faithful in my Bible study and prayer life. I hate how many distractions I let take the place of my time with the Lord.

three. I want to be easier on myself and not feel like a dissappointed when I can't be perfect or even good at something.

four. I want to try new recipes. Lately I've been fixing the same old things and I'd LOVE to try some new, different foods. I'd also like to to bake some more complicated things.

five. I want to be more outgoing. I tend to be more introverted and shy away from situations where I feel self-conscious (ex: a new workout class at the gym where I don't know anyone, etc). Because we're in a new town, it's been hard to make friends. I complain about it, but shy away from situations that might help me meet people. Sometimes I even don't put effort into friendships I already have. I'm bad about calling them which I hate because I truly love them and care. I'm going to try to be better!

six. I want to travel overseas. I want to see different cultures and enjoy different foods. I really hope that we'll be able to travel at some point.

seven. I want to know that I'm making a difference. With my job. In the lives of family and friends. For the Lord.

Alright, time to link up!

2 comments:

  1. Fear #5 Me too! Money can stress me out like whoa! Really debt can consume your life ahhh. Fear #7 I totally agree it's something that I have been really praying about and spending time just trying to make sure that I am doing what I am suppose to be doing. (will post on that whole deal soon)

    Your wants are way better than mine!! I really struggled with that one. I want all those things too!! p.s. def try a class at the gym!

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  2. Enjoyed reading these Kelsea! Thanks for your open honesty! Love you for it :-)

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