Jamaica: My Worldview

Feb 8, 2011

If you think you know how you feel about the World and the people in it....visit a country in poverty. You'll re-assess those feelings pretty quickly. I thought I truly had a grasp on the pain that others feel - after all - I'm so empathetic. Of course before I went to Jamaica, I knew all about people that live in poverty. I was ready for this. It was not going to shake me. After all, I had such a strong faith that God is in control. When I was at Lee, I took a Global Perspectives class in which we learned about culture shock - something I was sure would never touch me.

Know what ended up being even more of a shock than the culture? The realization that I didn't have it all together. 

It's hard to explain the feelings that came over me during my time there. After my pride was  forced to dissolve, I was left trying to pick up the pieces and put them back together in a way that made sense. 

It would take me too long to give you every detail of our trip - although I wish I had that much time, patience, and typing speed. 

I had and still have so many questions - questions I wish I could curl up in God's lap and ask Him face-to-face, questions I wanted to use to pick the brain of some people back home.

I still feel like I'm working through a lot since I've been home. The trip was one of the best things I've ever done. My heart is still there. I go to sleep literally every night wishing I was back at the school - back trying to help in whatever way I can - wishing I had the money that the school needed to simply survive. 

My faith truly has been tested this year. I've almost avoided reading the Word because I was too busy trying to work through it on my own - I suppose there are some answers about my own life and the way I'm living that I'm hesitant to face and change.

I am ready, though, to let the love that grew from the relationships that were created and the things that God used to change my heart to compel me to be better - to live wiser - to love more compassionately - to give unselfishly - to resist selfish needs - to put others first. 

I want to go back so badly and am excited about how I can help the school in the future. They are so close to my heart and I hope I never  forget their needs. 




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